Series 16 Episode 22:
Written by Edel Brosnan

Simon and Annabel have just got married. In his speech at the reception, Annabel’s father James gives them the keys to his house. After the best man’s speech, Simon gets up. He thanks the bridesmaid Sally, saying that without her he wouldn’t be able to say what he’s about to, and then announces that Annabel slept with Jules, his best man, last night. He calls Annabel a whore, and Jules punches him. A fight breaks out, and half of the guests join in. Despite James’s objections (he doesn’t want any publicity), someone calls the emergency services. Josh and Nikki arrive, and see to Simon and Jules, who have been injured the most – Annabel stabbed Simon with a fork. They are taken to Holby A&E in the ambulance, and the others follow on in their cars. As Simon is being treated, he says he got what he wanted – to publicly humiliate Annabel. Annabel comes in to see him, asking why he did it. He tells her that she humiliated him in private, so he humiliated her in public. She says it was a moment of madness; they don’t have to do anything like get a divorce. He says the marriage isn’t valid as it hasn’t been consummated, so he’s going to file for an annulment. She says he’s not getting his share of the house or a single penny of her father’s money, but Simon tells her that’s not the point: he couldn’t care less about the money; he just wanted to tell everyone what she was really like. Walking out, Annabel tells him that Jules was better than he ever was; Simon retorts that Jules said he’d had better sex at boarding school. Annabel is furious with her bridesmaid Sally for telling Simon, but Sally says that Simon had already guessed, and she just confirmed it. She says Simon wanted to go ahead with the wedding anyway, but she didn’t realise what he was going to do. Eventually Annabel forgives her, saying she shouldn’t have gone ahead with the marriage. She says she needs a holiday, but hasn’t got anyone to go with now – she’s not exactly flavour of the month. Sally offers to go with her, and they start making plans.
After watching Colette with a young page boy and bridesmaid, Josh tells her it makes him think about having a few of their own. Colette jokingly asks why stop at a few? He says there’s no harm thinking about it. Colette thinks about it for a couple of seconds, then reminds him that Holby’s youngest grandmother, saying they get enough sleepless nights, chaos and destruction in A&E.
Jeff, who was videoing the wedding, is in the department after getting punched in the eye during the fight. After his eye has been treated, he asks Jack if there is a pharmacy open, as he has run out of the spray he uses for angina. Jack offers to ask Dillon, who is on triage, to see him, as he could get the spray for him. Jeff agrees, and tells Dillon he has angina and has had a heart attack in the past; he says he’s been using the spray more often recently. He says he’s all right at the moment, but he likes to have the spray with him. Dillon goes to get the spray, but is held up, and Jeff decides not to wait. He tells Jack to tell Dillon that he’ll pick up the spray in the morning. Dillon returns to the triage room with Patrick, as he was concerned about Jeff’s health. When he discovers Jeff has gone, he has a go at Jack for letting him go. Suddenly they hear a can horn going off in the car park. Spencer, saying it might be car thieves, goes out to have a look, and Patrick, worried about his car, follows. They find Jeff in his car – he is having a heart attack and had fallen on his horn. Jeff is taken to resusc, where he is treated and soon starts to recover. Jack is in a state of shock, however. He tells Dillon he didn’t realise Jeff was having a heart attack; Dillon says neither did he, as Jeff ignored all the warning signs. He says that Jeff could have died, and tell Jack that so could he. He begins, ‘If you’ve got cancer…’ but Jack interrupts him, saying he hasn’t got cancer. He tells Dillon to stay out of his face, and walks off. Later, however, as he is clearing up in reception, he picks up a leaflet about testicular cancer, and starts reading it, and later, persuaded by Nikki, he decides to do something about his lump. When Max arrives early in the morning, Jack asks him to have a look. Max does so, and organises tests and an appointment with neurology, saying they can’t take any risks with cancer. He tells Jack that he has probably just saved his own life by going to him.
Comfort and Fin are sent to fetch a patient for a kidney transplant. Eddie is celebrating with his girlfriend Tanya that he should finally be able to live without dialysis, but Eddie tries not to get his hopes up too much. Tanya is married, and can’t come with him, but they say that if he has the transplant she’ll leave her husband for Eddie. As they put Eddie in the ambulance, Tanya asks Comfort to call her to tell her what’s happening to Eddie. Comfort says she can’t, but agrees to give Eddie a photo of them both, so that Tanya will be the first thing he sees when he comes round from the operation. In the ambulance, Eddie chats to Comfort and Fin, telling them that he’s always done everything by the book, eating and drinking only what he should, and working out at the gym, so that when this day came he’d be fit for it. As Comfort and Fin tease and flirt with each other, he asks if they are an item. They laugh and say that would never happen, adding that they’re paramedics and don’t have time for sex. Before long, Eddie starts to feel unwell – it’s his heart; it might just be angina but it might be a heart attack. They take him to A&E, and Patrick tries to treat him, but Eddie tries to stop them, not wanting anything to interfere with his transplant. Patrick tells him that they transplant’s off as he’s having a heart attack. Eddie doesn’t want to believe this, but when they phone the renal unit to let them know, he realises it’s true, and tells Patrick to do what he wants. In the refreshment area, Comfort and Fin are depressed about him. Comfort wonders whether she should phone Tanya. Fin is against the idea, but Comfort says that in Tanya’s shoes, she’d want to know. Fin says ‘But you wouldn’t be messing around, would you?’ Comfort looks away as she replies, ‘Never.’ She remembers the photo, which she forgot to give to Eddie, and asks Fin to take it to him while she phones Tanya. Tanya takes the news badly, and can’t believe it. Eddie takes the photo from Fin, who tells him to look after himself. As he is being taken out of resusc, Jeff tells him that their heart attacks have been wake up calls to both of them, and says they’ll have to play it by the book from now on. Eddie screws up the photo and drops it on the floor.
Lara and Patrick have been arguing for most of the night. Patrick has a go at her for smoking, and later slaps a nicotine patch on her back in a cubicle, saying that unfortunately the only thing it will stop her craving for is nicotine, not for promotion, attention, or always being right. She asks if he’s talking about her or himself. Patrick sits down and is about to ask her something when they are interrupted. Later, Lara asks him what he was going to say. Patrick says it would be a terrible idea, but she tells him to try her. He says he was going to tell her that she’s a nightmare to work with. Lara adds that it would never work, the two of them, and they continue, saying it’s just as well that nothing’s happened…yet. Patrick says if he thought about it, it would never happen. Lara says, ‘Then don’t think about it.’ They step closer, and are about to kiss when their bleeps go off. At the end of Patrick’s shift, he asks her if they can go and pick up where they left off, but Lara is working another shift, so she can have the weekend to revise. Patrick puts his arms round her, asking about her free weekend, but Max comes to the door of the staff room, telling Lara he needs her. She goes, and Patrick says, ‘You’re not the only one, Max.’

Episode first broadcast Saturday 3rd February 2002

Additional Cast
Jules          David Partridge
James          David Burke
Simon          Tom Smith
Annabel          Katherine Holme
Jeff          Andy Greenhalgh
Sally          Angel Coulby
Piers          Justin Shevlin
Shiftie          Bhasker Patel
Naomi          Judi Shekoni
Eddie Ramphosah          Anthony Warren
Tanya          Melissa Lloyd
Bob Driscoll          Mike Dowling
Maddy Lynch          Una Brandon-Jones